No Such Thing As A Bassoon In A Football Stadium


DanJamesAnna and special guest John Lloyd discuss Elgar's football chant, Bin Laden's favourite team, Cantona's childhood cave and the wrong sized balls.

Episode 17                        11 July, 2014

Further Reading


Elgar wrote the first known football chant and fans of his team, Wolverhampton Wanderers, still sing his more famous 'Nimrod' at matches.

Arsenal's swear-word-free chant book didn't catch on, but the team did count Bin Laden as a fan.

Here's goalie Leigh Roose who did acrobatics on the crossbar and here's England's Chant Laureate.

Cantona tried to register 'Ooh aah Cantona' as a trademark, David Hasselhoff won the phrase 'Don't hassle the Hoff' in his divorce settlement, and referee Graham Poll lamented that his name rhymed with 'hole' - perfect for offensive chants.

Pleading 'Crime of Passion' can get you a reduced sentence - but doesn't work for parking space theft.

Referees used to have hankies instead of whistles, and ball boys were introduced to make Fatty Foulke look bigger.  

In 1280 a footballer died after running into an opponent's daggerone-armed 'El Manco' scored the winning goal in the first World Cup Final. 

British Olympic football is wrought with controversy, while the 1920 final ended before half time when the Czechs stormed off the pitch.

In the 2014 World Cup, the Dutch team booked their hotel in Brazil until July 7th, causing problems when they reached the semi-finals on July 9th.

Kim Jong-Il banned any World Cup coverage that didn't show North Korea winning.

Darwin and his sons played bassoon to earthworms to find out if they could hear.

Darwin and his sons played bassoon to earthworms to find out if they could hear.

Eric Cantona was brought up in a cave.

Eric Cantona was brought up in a cave.
The first World Cup finalThe first World Cup final












Monster Bat Incident

Monster Bat Incident
Rail station includedRail station included

FIFA has 16 more members than the United Nations, but neither recognises Kosovo.

Dick, Kerr
Ladies FC

When women's football was more popular than men'sWhen women's football was more popular than men's