The Many Uses For a Pig
Christien Meindertsma’s book PIG 05049 charts the mind-boggling array of products that different parts of an anonymous pig called 05049 were used to create. Beyond the obvious foodstuffs and gelatine, she found that different parts of the animal offered the following pork derivatives:
Skin: Safety gloves, cosmetic surgery (collagen), energy bars (collagen), low-fat butter, chewing gum, x-ray films, drug capsules, bread (flour improver made from hair). The skin is also used for tattoo practice and ‘ballistic gelatin’ used to simulate human flesh for testing bullets.
Internal organs: pet food, tambourine skins (bladder), heart valves (surgery), surgical anticoagulants (stomach mucus), insulin (pancreas).
Bones: refining cadmium, cheap wine corks, stabilising propellant in bullet making, inkjet paper, concrete, match heads, bone china, train brakes, yogurt, fabric softener, beer, wine, ice-cream.
Fat: biodiesel, soap, shampoos, crayons.
Blood: cigarette filters, colourant in some ham, fish food, aluminium ingot moulds, toothpaste.
Misc: paint brushes (bristle), chemical weapons testing (ears).
NOTE: not all examples of the above contain pork products – just some. Don’t want the manufacturers up in arms. Unless it’s the arms manufacturers.
The paradise of my fancy is one where pigs have wings.
Truffle pigs aside, the pig is the only farm animal that is useful to man only when dead.
Male pigs have penises shaped like left-handed corkscrews.
I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.